Hot Gimmicky Schemes: Calculators

Okay, who will seriously buy this and not be over the age of 30 and creepily single?

Okay, who will seriously buy this and not be over the age of 30 and creepily single?

According to a release from Bandai and Sharp, a new calculator will be hitting Japan’s shelves in March. It won’t support trigonometric equations; it won’t computate cubic roots; but it does have President Shima Kosaku (and a cellphone strap).

Stop right there. Sharp is making a calculator, where the only saving grace is that it comes with a small cellphone strap? They’re expecting people to pay 3500 yen (about $42) for this?

All this just to cover declining calculator sales? Bravo. Whatever happened to building innovative products people want to buy for utility? All this is, is an EL-339HB with some gimmicky art work pasted on.

These calculators aren’t even all that good. You want to make a calculator that sells? Sharp needs to build something that rivals the Casio FX-260 Solar. Now that is what I call a calculator. It does fractions, all manner of exponential equations, complex mathematical equations, and it comes with a nice protective plate so the schoolyard bully can’t throw it and ruin the face. (He’ll still give you an Indian rope burn, though.) You know how much this costs? $10.

You want some anime on your calculator? Buy some stickers. Or, better yet, make one. The solid grey case makes for easy customization!

With a little customization on the case, my Fx-260 has become the symbol of cool that everyone at school wants (to beat me up for). Thanks Xzibit!

4 responses to “Hot Gimmicky Schemes: Calculators”

  1. Mike P Avatar
    Mike P

    Sooo…I take it news is slow right now?

    1. Tomo Hirai Avatar
      Tomo Hirai

      There’s always news, I just focus on stuff that doesn’t matter.

  2. KoreanHapa Avatar

    I kind of thought they were cute, but then I’m an old. 🙂 Funny post, Tomo.

    1. Tomo Hirai Avatar
      Tomo Hirai

      If you show up to work with one of those, I’ll cry.

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